A Little Bump in the Road

It has been quite awhile since I posted and now that I seem to have plenty of time on my hands for atleast a little while, I am going to post a bit more often. So a little bump in the road has occured on the Fitzgerald's path to awaiting the arrival of Baby Kiptin Ryan. My pregnancies have all been uneventful and beyond enjoyable and I absolutely love being pregnant and really miss it once it is all over. This pregnancy has been very similar to my other 2 and I have really stayed in great shape the whole time working out 5 days a week and my energy level has been beyond what I ever expected. So why would I think that it would suddenly take a turn. The last week or so, I have been saying that the pressure has been pretty intense low and I never remember feeling so much pressure before I delivered. I sort of eased up a bit at the gym on Tues. and took it easy with my workout and still really felt uncomfortable. Tuesday nite I was hurting but went to sleep and woke up with the same pressure throughout the day. Finally at naptime, I was having problems standing up straight because the pressure had gotten so bad and for me to be alarmed, I guess I knew something wasn't right. I called the dr. and they told me to go ahead to the hospital and get monitored. What....this wasn't in my schedule and Jack had his last baseball game and trophy hand-out tonight and I never missed a game before. I was full out panicking because things just weren't ready for all of this to happen atleast not tonight. The panic set in but I now had another baby to worry about too so off to the hospital we went. Meanwhile I had to rely on my neighbor, who is also one of my truest friends to come over and watch my 2 kids along with her 3. By the time we got to the hospital, I was in a lot of pain with intense pressure and was worried to say the least. After being checked in, I was hooked up to all the monitors to check the baby out and his heartbeat was great and at first they weren't seeing any signs of consistent contractions, which would then in turn mean, preterm labor. After being there for about 2hrs., I started panicking about Rob or I not being there for Jack's last baseball game and his trophy hand-out so I decided to convince Rob to go home and get the boys and bring them to the baseball game since it seemed like nothing was too serious here with Kiptin and I. I must say that the whole time I was laying in the bed, I kept feeling contractions but it just wasn't showing on screen and the nurses weren't saying anything so I was in the clear, right?? NOPE...Rob couldn't have left more than 5 minutes when everything seemed to go a bit chaiotic. THe dr. came back in with a nurse and said we are so sorry but the monitors we had on were not picking up the contractions you had been having this whole time and unfortunately, we can now see you are in preterm labor and your contractions are about 5 minutes apart and we are going to start giving you steriods in case the baby's lungs aren't 100% developed and a shot of something to stop the contractions and antibiotics in case of Group Strep B, which I never got tested for yet so just in case, baby would be safe from it. If the contractions could not be stopped or I dialated anymore, I was told they had to take Kiptin immediately when any of those signs occured. Talk about panic, I just sent Rob on his way to baseball with the boys and I did not want any of this baby stuff to take away from Jack's special day so I just didn't tell Rob what was going on. I called a few times to see how everything was going and to get an idea on how quickly he would be done just in case things took a turn for the worse. After he called me from inside the car on his way home with the boys, I then told him what was going on and he needed to come back as soon as he had everything settled down at home. When I initially went in, I was excited to maybe see Kiptin that day but until the visit from the NICU doctor, I knew he needed to stay put. After Rob got back to the hospital, the dr. from the NICU came in and started explaining to us the best and worst case scenerios for a baby born at 34wks. Even the best case scenerio was not what I wanted. To think my baby could be in the NICU for weeks, need a feeding tube, need assistance breathing, any of this was way too much for me to handle. I was a wreck and all I could think of was what did I do?? Was it my fault?? Did I workout too much?? Did I not give my body enough relaxation?? Instantly it was something I did wrong or didn't do. The mother's guilt is so bad and I am not sure if it will ever let up. I am constantly running around and doing everything under the su for my kids and if for 2 minutes I do something for myself I think I am not being the best mom I could be. So anyway...by about 5am that next morning, the contractions were under control and I was probably going to be released that evening after my dr. came in to check on me and the maternal fetal monitor dr. came to do a 4D sono on the baby. THey said around 7pm ish, I would be on my way of all looked good. So my dr came in around 6pm and I was still only 1cm dialated and the only orders were a seditary lifestyle. (AKA modified bedrest) What!?!?!?!?! Me, staying still and relaxing??? Who would watch my kids and entertain them, would they be upset with me or the baby for this?? There went the mother's guilt. TO be honest, after the discussion with the NICU doctor, I was ready to listen and do what was best for the baby to the best of my ability. Around 10pm, the sono dr. came in just a few hrs late because his own child had a 105 fever and he was home taking care of her. He had this new sonogram machine that was worth more than a real sonogram machine that you would see at a dr. office because it was the size of a laptop. It was incredible!! When he had me all hooked up, there right in front of our eyes was our angel in 4D and looked like a real person with chubby cheeks, hair, big lips and of course, the BIG Fitzgerald head that seems to be the one definite gene my kids inherit from their dad. I was looking at Rob as he was watching the screen and you could see the smile from ear-to-ear as he looked at his 3rd son safe and sound. Because all my pregnancies have been uneventful, we don't get to see what the baby looks like after 28wks until they enter the world and here we were looking at our son that actually looked like a real person in there. To say we left with a smile on our face would be quite the understatement. So how has life been the last week or so...difficult. Rob luckily was able to be home from when I got home from the hospital until Tuesday so that was beyond a relief. Basically I am trying to relax on the couch when I can, which is basically when the boys go to nap and Rob gets home from work. I have been going to the gym everyday since Tues. from 9:30-11:30 so the boys can still get out some energy and take their classes that they love and I have been sitting in the lounge or by the pool and reading to keep myself busy. After that its lunch time and playtime and then naptime which is when I get to put my feet up again. My children are used to being on the go and I can't blame them because I would hate to be cooped up inside a house too so I am trying to keep things as normal and routine as possible. Rob just can't understand why I can't just stay on the couch but it is literally impossible with 2 kids. The minute the pressure gets bad or Rob comes through the door, I do try to sit down and Rob takes over even though he is exhausted from work and everything else he does around the house. Rob has been an angel through this and is really trying to take over completely but I can see he is worn down and nervous about the baby and keeping him safe. Overall, I feel great and just happy he is staying calm inside and soon we will meet our HEALTHY baby boy. To think I won't be pregnant soon is so sad to me because I just love every minute of it but I can't wait to get my hands on this little guy.